10+1 principles
I’m 23 years old. That’s not a long time. But that’s enough time for me to think I have understood a few things about life.
Figuring out timeless principles to live your life by is both exceedingly annoying and overtly interesting. On one hand, you understand that you can answer the question of how to live a better life, and the quest of those principles is interesting. But on the other hand, the process is erratic. Sometimes you chance upon a life lesson randomly. Other times you keep repeating a mistake countless times before it finally strikes you.
I’m 23 years too young sometimes. Other times I’m 23 years too old. I’m constantly bounced between the two by people; family, friends, colleagues etc. Age is so fascinating. Even though there is no rules to this game, you feel bound by social conventions on how you’re supposed to act at your age. Between society’s anxiety of infantilizing young adults, lest they challenge the status quo manned by elder men whose only job is to fantasize about their supposedly glorious youthful days, and your family’s age rhetoric (‘you will never grow up’) - you’re supposed to figure out how to live a life yourself. It is fascinating that for a society that prides itself for being tight knit, the Indian family is a site of terrible loneliness.
Given that we’re all left to figure out life by ourselves, here’s a few things I’ve realized:
It is important that you sit down and ask yourself what is important for you in life. Be particular about it. Write it down. Think hard before you decide. Once you decide, let these principles be the guiding light of your life.
If you want to create anything of value, or achieve anything of significance - know that you’ll have to work really hard for it irrespective of how smart you think you are.
Don’t let go of friends or love when you’re young thinking that you’ll catch up on them later. There is no later. This is it. Love, friends and family are not a variable to be traded off. They matter.
Take bets on yourself. Objectively, those are the safest bets you can place. You can’t control other people or circumstances. But you can control yourself. Trust yourself.
Aspire to learn deeply and not widely. The latter makes you sound cool, but it is the former that really makes you intelligent.
Strong opinions, loosely held. Have fidelity to "the truth" or at least the aspiration to know it, and not to any specific idea or philosophy. Have strong opinions but be willing to change them quickly if you encounter a sound reasoning.
Never impose self limiting restrictions. Most often they are imagined. If you really want to do something, figure out the best way for you to do it and work as hard as you can.
As Sam Altman said, ‘The days are long but the decades are short’ - you can just sit by and have your life pass by you. If you want to do anything of significance, develop a sense of urgency. Go from macro to micro. Act in small measures. Fill the day.
Asking people for help and advice is a life hack. Patrick Collison likes to say that studying history is a hack to develop the future. Likewise, learning from other’s experiences and insights is a huge advantage. Ask shamelessly.
Stand alone, carry others. Accept that life is hard, and you’ll often find yourself alone under difficult circumstances. Develop resolve to bash on regardless.
Be calm. Seek internal peace. There’s nothing more valuable than that.
A life full of curiosity, peace, comfort, and companionship is worth working for. But it also takes a lot of effort to be able to build this. None of this will fall into your lap. Work hard to build what you want. It’s worth it.